Dear Little Lucy – The Courting Panda

Dear Little Lucy,

One day, deep in the bamboo forest I came to a clearing and saw a beautiful sight. She was sitting there bathed in sunlight and the stripes on her fur looked as soft as flower petals. I sat and stared while I chewed on my lunch. I was too overwhelmed by her beauty. Later, I heard from the other animals that her name was Meili. Her very names means beauty. She was relocated to my part of the forest a month ago. She doesn’t seem to mind my presence when we sit near each other. We look quietly at each other in our meeting place every day. Neither of us speak. We just sit and eat. Every day, I try to work up the courage to say something – anything, but alas no words pour out. I know female pandas are difficult to court. What do I say to such a beauty? A few days ago, I arrived early and placed a flower near her favorite tree. She sniffed around and found it. To my surprise, she placed the flower behind her tiny ear. Then she smiled at me! My hand shook and my mouth went dry. My heart thudded and then nothing. I was speechless. What am I to do? How do I make the next move? Please help. I don’t know what step is next in courting my love.

Sincerely,

The Courting Panda

(Look for Lucy’s reply next week. What are your thoughts? How does a Panda court another mate? Send Dear Little Lucy a comment to include.)

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Dear Little Lucy from One Tired Hamster

Dear Little Lucy,

I feel like a failure. Recently a few new things appeared in my cage. I think my master is displeased by something I did. I climbed inside this shiny new contraption and it began to move. I was trapped in the shiny round thing for hours as it spun and spun. If that wasn’t enough my delicious nibbles were changed into bland pellets that smell like hay. Is my master trying to punish me? Where did my flavorful nibblets go? The worst part is I am so so curious about the shiny round thing I can’t stop myself from climbing in. I run and run for hours. What am I to do? Is this some kind of animal abuse? Please help.

Sincerely,
One Tired Hamster

Dear One Tired Hamster,

Do not try to worry your running legs so. We domestic pets have been experiencing this for years. For some reason when our human owners go on a health kick they feel the need to make their pets suffer along with them. I think it’s because they don’t want to suffer alone. Let’s all hope this is another one of their trends that will go out of style, or we may have to skew the data at the test labs. The shiny new round thing in your cage is called a hamster wheel. Yes, I agree it looks like a torture device but with practice you can keep yourself fit. I think it’s like the exercise machine the humans call the treadmill. As for the change of food, those are probably diet pellets. I know they can’t replace your tastier nibblets but don’t worry I’m sure your master means well. Think of it this way they are trying to extend your life with these changes. They seem to think exercise and a healthier diet will make them live longer. So your master truly has good intentions by thinking the same changes in your life will have the same effect.

Sincerely,
Little Lucy